A Day. I Ran. I accomplished things. Anxiety

I guess I’m allowed to post a pix that I hate

It was a good day, an okay day…am allowed to say I’m happy I did stuff.

Someone else recently posted something about social anxiety, as I read it, and reread, and more I did, the more I thought, THAT’S ME!

I have to say though, I don’t know. Is it something I can hide….or fool others or myself ….?

As the day goes by, I put a virtual check mark next to anything……driving to get my car’s tires torqued, yeah done…had to talk to other people, and got that done….so a check marks and giving myself a pat on the back…not huge, but for me to leave my couch, from being in front of my TV and from my laptop is something…..then walked into COSTO, did some shopping, crossed with someone I hadn’t seen for a while, and yeah got it done, another getting out and about check mark..

Then getting home, throwing my gear on and went for a run……again, normally, I woud have said, I did a few things, that’s enough…now to cocoon?…..I’ve planned to run a lot for what’s left of 2023, so the goal was that I had to get outside, but still, amongst people?

Actually there weren’t a lot of people out on the trails, and actually no runners, just really dog walkers…but still I got outside, and out….and it was okay, and it felt good…

I stopped by my Running Room store for a social visit aftwards, and that felt good too…chatted with two I guess still are co-workers….it was good, we chatted…and then went home and made dinner for the family

I’ve always had this……..not well, understanding or trusting myself, or being comfortable with myself….

Always feeling out here on my own…

I have to admit, I like organizing things like this, but am constantly shocked when anyone shows up…..

I’m not someone that attracts, I occasionally feel like a bit of a fraud, and I’m pretty sure there’s other reasons that people show up and join in and run with me….I’m usually not someone other people think of, or if they do, I’m like their 3rd or fourth choices….and seriously, I wouldn’t think about me either…..

This is from years ago, another group, another run…….I do hate pictures of myself too….but yeah orgainzing is good, I think this is one of the runs, training runs I’d organized and people that weren’t even a part of our usual group, they just joined in